Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Grown-up or old?

My sister just sent me a funny list of ways to tell whether you're grown-up, which I thought I'd share here:

However, once I read these over I realized I am beyond grown-up. I'm old! Or at least middle-aged. So I came up with my own list and sent it back to her. Here it is!

How to tell if you’re middle-aged:

1. You're too tired to care if your bed is double or single.
2. The food in your fridge has things like "low fat" and "high probiotics" on them.
3. You can't stay up late OR get up early.
4. Your favorite songs are not only in the elevator but on commercials.
5. You read the stock pages and listen to the Wall Street news with interest.
6. You've been working so long your vacation is back up to 30 days.
7. You are wearing stretchy waisted pants and loose tops that you don't tuck in; jeans are too tight and uncomfortable.
8. You're the one calling the police because your neighbors aren't mowing their grass AND their kids are too noisy.
9. You're the older relative telling the sex jokes.
10. You were already grown up when Taco Bell opened their first store.
11. You're now feeding your dog All Natural Organic dog food instead of Science Diet.
12. Your car is paid for and has 212,200 miles on it.
13. Sleeping in bed makes your back hurt; the couch is out of the question.
14. Date? What's a date?
15. You're on Prevacid so the chicken wings are now acceptable again.
16. You go to the drug store for your prescriptions and discuss which drugs you're on with your friends.
17. You've become such a wine connoisseur that you know a good $4.00 bottle of wine from Portugal that's better than most more expensive ones!
18. You've given up drinking altogether because of health reasons.
19. Your friends are too old to get pregnant.
20. You actually sit there and think up 20 ways to know you're middle-aged when your sister sends you a joke entitled "How to tell when you're grown-up."


RUTH said...

Brilliant! Your list back to your sister is excellent....LOL

Liz Hinds said...

And you wear proper bras because if you didn't your boobs would dangle on your knees.

Mauigirl said...

Oh, excellent add-on, Liz! LOL! I'm sure if we worked on it we could come up with 20 more!

Anonymous said...

Great job! I had so much fun reading both of the lists!

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