Middle Age is when you go into the City for a meeting with a whole bunch of young 20-something/early 30-something marketing types, and you wear the only comfortable pair of shoes you could possibly imagine walking 16 blocks from Penn Station to the site of the meeting in, namely something like these:
And your feet - and ankles - still hurt even when you wear them...
And when you arrive and are sitting in the meeting with the rest of the attendees and you surreptitiously check out their choice of shoes, you see that all the young women (most of whom are young enough to be your daughters) are wearing shoes that basically are the same kind of shoes you used to put on your Barbie dolls:
And not only are they wearing them, but they don't seem to be in pain or have any trouble walking in them...
And then it hits you. You will never be able to wear cool shoes like that again. You will never be in style again.
When you buy low-riding pants (formerly known as hip-huggers in your youth) they fall down when you try to walk, being pushed down by the weight of your stomach.
You can't wear regular jeans anymore because for some reason they are making them all just too tight in the waist. So you have to buy those jeans with the elastic stretchy panel in the waist in order for them to fit properly. This means you can't tuck in your shirts, so you wear overblouses.
And you top off the whole look - or should I say, bottom off the look? With orthopedic sandals.
Yes, middle age has arrived. You can't fight it. You might as well enjoy it and accept it for what it is.
The good part of middle age is you're no longer insecure, because you don't care anymore if you look great as long as your clothes are clean. Your husband loves you anyway and your friends and you have a great time together. The pressure is off and life is good. You feel better about yourself than you ever did back when you were 20-something, and you wouldn't go back to being that age for anything.
But once in awhile it would be nice to wear cool shoes.